moogyboobling: February 2007

I hadn't realised it had been so long since I blogged. Those boys and schools runs keeping me busy. Plus computer time has been limited since the main PC gave up on us!
Must admit we did abuse it a little, expecting way too much from it, not enough memory, dodgy heatsink/fan wotsit, it overclocked all summer unless we took the sides off!
Thank goodness I have the laptop but I am missing my photoshop!

Tyler came out with a funny one today.

He's been learning electric guitar at school and they are allowed to make song requests. Tiggsy asked for Teen Spirit. The teacher taught him how to play it and told him a little about Kurt Cobain. Then today we watched the video on youtube. I told him about Dave Grohl now being in Foo Fighters. Tyler then asked why they didn't replace Kurt and carry on like when they replaced Gregg in the Wiggles with Sam! I just had to write that down to show him in a decade!

I'll be on TV Monday night perhaps. Although part of me hopes I've been edited out! Travelling into London with baby in tow is not at all conducive to a glamourous yummy mummy ready for her close up, more like a frazzled milky harrassed one! I also rambled on for hours and I'm sure I missed out lots of intelligently thought out points against GF and only came out with nonsense. I'll be watching with my eyes a bit closed.
Anyone who knows me knows gina is my nemesis. I could write on for hours about my problem with her but I'll try and shorten it.

She's unqualified and has no children.

Dominating! The bookshelves that is. For years now she's been faced up with a shelftalker out the bottom (before you ask no I will not photoshop that) in Waterstones. Walk into Mothercare and all you can find is her and Supernanny (I also have issues with her but at least she did try and defend herself when I rang her once). What hope has a new mum with little support have of making an informed choice when the only options are of the strict detached quick fix variety?

Her methods appear to work. Society and it's warped childist view on how babies should behave has led to many people believing the behaviour of a trained baby to be desirable. Convenient it maybe, healthy it is not! There's a serious lack of foresight in quick fix approaches to parenting like those in her books.

Scheduled feeding, if you have common sense it should be obvious this is wrong. Successful full term breastfeeding would be hard to achieve on such a regime. You may manage a month or 2, after that supply issues can arise. Controlling food is a dodgy thing to do, what kind of associations are being made by teaching a child to ignore hunger signs. Then you have the serious risk of dehydration. Babies should be fed on cue, all the evidence supports this so why does GF say otherwise?

Leaving babies to cry. For me just the knowledge that right now somewhere in this world at least one baby is being left to cry brings me close to tears myself. Even the mums I know who have done this say "it breaks your heart to do it..." Yes it does...because it's supposed to! Mothers are supposed to be stressed by their babies cries so they can respond accordingly. But these mothers believe they are doing good because some book or uneducated health visitor has told them to do it.
To put it basically it's brain damaging. It's negatively influencing the way that young immature brain is developing. All those pathways are being made under the influence of hormones released through stress. Buggering it all up! This is where the foresight comes in. Baby may seem fine the next day, try waiting a decade and see how it is then. If the brain develops under these conditions all kinds of problems can arise, from mental health issues like depression to stress related conditions and immune system disorders. Addictions is more likely too. I don't remember seeing a disclaimer in the contented baby book pointing out these risks.

The excuse GF fans give. Happy mum=happy baby bollocks. Yes a baby will pick up on your moods. Still no excuse for moulding your child into some unatural, unhealthy routine with the only benefits being those for the parents (or so they think, if they experienced and attached replationship with their child they will realise what they are missing). Blimming selfish if you ask me.
If anything strict regimes can lead to depressed mothers. If you have no idea about babies except your baby and some bestselling book and your baby doesn't fit the book, you may feel a failure (I've been informed this is a common side effect of the books). If you are already predisposed to PND it's certainly not going to help you at all. Just the crying will alter your own stress levels and affect your mood. Attached babies who have their needs met are quite often happier babies.
Babies have a right to be treated the way they are physiologically designed to be cared for. They have some innate behaviour to help guide the mother in her caregiving but when some book tells you to ignore all of that, all those years of evolution that have gone into creating us, it's just plain bonkers. That's numberwang!
She's robbing us blind. Of money (40 quid to join her website to hear more of this nonsense), of instincts (because telling a mother to not feel guilty about leaving her baby to cry is doing just that), of bonding, of a life (how do you go out when sticking to some routine), and of fun!
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Just relax, be responsive, stop comparing, your baby is unique, hungry when they feel like it, sleep when they are tired and quite rightly want a cuddle most of the time!
They grow up way too fast so make the most of it .